


See You In a Minute

by CitybytheBayside



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, F/M, Post-Canon Fix-It
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-24
Updated: 2019-06-24
Packaged: 2020-05-18 18:06:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19339789
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CitybytheBayside/pseuds/CitybytheBayside
Summary: They may have won. But at what cost? Steve realizes he must correct an outcome that should never have been.





	See You In a Minute

**Author's Note:**

> I’ve been feeling some Romanogers ideas swirling in my head since Endgame, so I decided to join the fray of people writing fix-it’s to THAT scene. Hope I provide a unique take on that concept.

_“Who do you want me to be?”_

_“How bout a friend?”_

Steve opened his eyes. It was the dead of night in his basic New York apartment. More memories of days gone by, flooding into his head when attempting to sleep. This was bad enough in the immediate aftermath of his waking up from the ice. Remembering the war he had been in. Remembering his Commandos. Remembering Peggy. Now it’s remembering what had happened three months earlier. Restoring those Thanos snapped away. The battle against Thanos. Losing Tony.

Losing Nat.

But as it was with his memories of the 1940s, the memories he had of her had to be quieted. She was gone, and she wasn’t coming back. With a renewed heaviness in his heart, Steve attempted to return to sleep.

* * *

He was summoned by Fury to New York. A means to assemble a new age of Avengers. With the compound decimated, SHIELD set up shop in the old tower Tony had for them at first. Steve was one of only a few people in person. Thor, the Guardians of the Galaxy , King T’Challa, Captain Marvel and Ant-Man all appeared on monitors while Steve, Sam, Bucky, Rhodey, Wanda, Peter Parker and Doctor Strange joined Fury and Maria Hill in person.

“I wish to seek ways the people can rely on any and all of you to pick up arms should this size a threat ever emerge again.” Fury asked.

“Mr. Fury I don’t see why assembling us was required. The answer to me seems obvious.” Steve looked over to Doctor Strange, who had just spoken. He was the guy who was able to foresee all the outcomes. “That being said I don’t believe I’d act as part of the Avengers. I act in the best interest of our world and many others.”

“Well, I’ll take what I can get I suppose. As long as we got eyes here, in your other worlds and other realms. Anyway, I suppose that’s all I had to say. Thank you for coming in.”

Fury rose with Hill and both exited. Steve found himself headed over toward Strange as the few others in the room adjourned.

“Doctor.” he said. Strange looked to him, and extended his hand.

“Captain. I don’t believe we had the pleasure of meeting formally.”

Steve shook it. “Apologies for that, though I think we can both absolve ourselves given what was happening at that time.”

“Indeed.”

“So you’re capable of magic?”

Strange grinned. “In boiler terms yes.”

Steve felt a bit embarrassed. “I don’t mean to insult you-“

“No insult taken, Captain. I am capable of accessing mythical abilities.”

“Such as the portals you opened on that field.”

Strange nodded lightly, a look of regret on his face. “Captain I’m sensing you’re going to ask me about whether I can access the afterlife. I’m afraid that’s a land off limits to me. I couldn’t bring Stark back if I wanted to.”

Steve sighed. “I guess she was right. I am an easy read.”

Strange quirked an eyebrow. “She?”

“A friend. She’s actually the one I was gonna ask about.”

“Natasha Romanoff I take it. Her sacrifice for the Soul Stone was unfortunately required for our victory. The Soul Realm is equally as off limits to access for me.”

Steve appeared confused now. “What’s the difference between the afterlife and the Soul Realm?”

“It’s essentially the same thing, but it’s where souls go when they fall to the Stone. It’s where she went when she sacrificed herself, and it was where half of all living life went when Thanos initially succeeded.”

Looking down, Steve continued. “So there’s no way of getting there then.”

“I’m afraid not. Not us humans anyway. Only whatever or whoever oversees it can. Besides it’s immensely doubtful that the people were literally trapped in the realm, just their essences. Nothing to reach in and take out. I’m sorry Captain.”

“I understand Doctor. Thank you for humouring me at least.”

Strange gave a curt nod before he departed. Steve sighed and rested his hands upon his hips in disappointment.

* * *

_“You know I keep telling everybody they should move on and... grow. Some do. But not us.”_

Steve awoke again, still being flooded with memories. He sat up, rubbing his head. It was just about 2 in the morning now. He’d been in and out of sleep since 10 PM. Scooping up his cellphone on the nightstand, he dialled up a number and put it on speaker.

“ _Hello?_ ” Scott Lang answered.

“Scott. Sorry for the last call. Did I wake you at all?”

“ _No no. Just finished watching a movie with Hope and Cassie. How’s it going, Cap? We assembling at all?_ ”

“No nothing like that. I was calling to ask a question. About the quantum realm.”

“ _Oh. What would that question be?_ ”

“Well, I guess I was just seeing if...if there’s really no possibility that we could go back, get Natasha from before her death. Bring her home, you know?”

“ _Ahh. By no means is it a case of I wouldn’t want to, but Doctor Banner took me and Hank aside to make it very clear to us by no means can we drastically alter anything if we were to go back in time. It’s why the stones had to be individually returned to each of their original spots. Them not being there would endanger that dimension. And in Natasha’s case, in all cases her removal before her sacrifice would harm that dimensions ability to stop Thanos._ ”

“I figured. I suppose I just needed reminding of that.”

“ _You’re struggling to sleep at night thinking about it, huh._ ”

“Yeah.”

“ _I sympathize. Couldn’t stop thinking about Hope when we planned the mission to get the stones. It’s just...hard not to think about in that situation. I may not have known Natasha like you did but she was a brave woman._ ”

“She was. Sorry again about calling so late Scott. I’ll leave you to it.”

“ _Sounds good Captain._ ”

“Scott you can call me Steve now.”

“ _Right sorry Captain. Steve. Sorry. Captain Steve._ ”

“Goodnight Scott.” Steve said with light amusement. He hung up and stored his phone back on the nightstand. As he laid back on his bed, he accepted he’d likely not be able to shake her off his mind. So he focused on one of his favourite memories as he closed his eyes.

* * *

_“Hey you.”_

_The words made him look to the doorway. Natasha stood there, analyzing surely._

_“You took off suddenly.”_

_He did his best to put on a front. “Sorry. Tony was just getting a bit too overbearing. You know how he is.”_

_He waited for a laugh but it didn’t come. She remained looking at him. “No. You’re sad.”_

_He sighed. “Why do you say that?”_

_“You’re an easy read.” She walked further in, taking a seat in the chair across from his couch. “What’s wrong?”_

_He shifted in his seat as he sat up straighter. “Peggy died.”_

_Her gaze softened. “I’m so sorry.”_

_“Thank you.” he said quietly. “She went peaceful, so that’s a solace.”_

_“You doing okay?”_

_He half shrugged. “She...she didn’t remember me. In the end.”_

_Steve looked at her, watching as she rose from her seat and sat next to him on the couch. She proceeded to pull him close to let his head rest on her shoulder. And they proceeded to sit like that for hours._

This memory was similar to others. The two of them leaning on the other. It was a comfort tactic they’d adapted when one was sad. He did the same for her when Bruce disappeared. She would do the same after Peggy’s funeral. If only she was there when Tony died. Her warmth was something he could’ve done with, as he was sure his would’ve for her.

* * *

“ _We should be back in Earth’s galaxy by next week._ ” Peter Quill told the group over the holographic message. “ _We took a job transporting some jewels belonging to this An-and-_ “

“ _Andocregsnian._ ” Thor interjected. “ _These jewels are considered some of the oldest relics in the galaxy._ ”

“ _Hey I’m giving the report._ ” Peter whined. “ _Also you’re hitting me in the face with your beer gut._ ”

“ _I’ll have you know I’ve lost weight._ ”

Peter appeared as if mimicking what Thor just said. Steve sat back in his chair, shaking his head at the pettiness. Sam leaned forward and set his hand on the desk.

“Are you guys gonna kill one another before next week?”

“ _I might kill them._ ” Rocket shouted from offscreen.

“ _You wouldn’t kill me so soon after busting your ass to bring me back._ ”

“ _I did that mostly for Groot._ ”

“We’ll see you next week.” Steve said, ending the call. He stood up and began heading out of the office. Sam shook his head with a laugh.

“This world has gotten so weird man.”

“How you figure?” Steve asked jokingly.

“Just so many things that if you told me would happen like ten years ago I’d call you crazy. Like hell, we’re in direct communication with a talking raccoon.” 

Sam noticed Steve sort of freeze up after he said that. 

“You okay?” Sam asked.

Steve looked to him, shaking his head to say yes. “I’m good. I just...remembered someone saying something like that once. I’ll see you shortly, yeah?”

Steve walked out of the room, leaving Sam looking on after him. He was mulling following him but a message from Fury stopped him. He spent the next half hour talking to him before wandering around the temporary base of operations, soon finding Steve in a room looking through one of his books of sketches, seemingly touching up one. Upon a closer look it was of Natasha, back when she met with them in the cemetery after stopping Hydra. Steve soon began flicking through the rest of the book and it seemed Natasha was the subject of all the sketches in it.

“I’m wondering if she would be flattered or weirded out.” Sam said, announcing his presence. Steve didn’t jump or flinch, just turned to him with a small smile.

“She knew about this. Modeled for me a lot actually.”

“We talking tasteful or Titanic style?”

Steve looked confused.

“Still haven’t seen Titanic?”

“Haven’t had time to cross things off the list in awhile.”

Steve flicked to a sketch and showed Sam one of Natasha sitting under a tree looking up at the sunny sky.

“You could make some real money off your skills. This is near enough a photograph.”

“None of these would be for sale.”

Sam looked at him.

“You really loved her, huh?”

Steve took some time, but he eventually nodded.

“Everything with Thanos happened so fast. None of us really got much time to register it. We mourned of course, but then we had to get the stones ready. Then the battle happened. I found myself looking back at it, and realizing how she wasn’t there by my side. She’s managed to be part of any memory or dream I have every day since then.”

He looked to Sam.

“And I’ve been becoming more aware of how selfish I’ve been about it. I’ve never asked you or Clint about it. I’m sorry about that.”

Sam turned solemn looking, look pointed towards the floor. “It felt like I lost a sister. She always had my back. I thought I always had hers. But I couldn’t be there to stop her. I get it. A sacrifice for the Stone. But...”

Steve looked away, sighing softly. 

“When you were...erased....did you remember anything? About where you went?”

Sam thinks about the question. “I haven’t thought about that. It was just as if life paused. Then we were back, and it was five years later.”

“Sorry. Guess part of me wondered whether there was some land everyone was standing around in.”

“And you wondered if I saw her there. Sorry man. It real felt like just a pause. I was sitting in the grass, wondering where Thanos was....”

Sam trailed off, realizing he remembered something. Steve snapped his gaze back to him. Sam continued.

“There was...yellow.”

“Yellow?”

“Yeah. I can’t remember if there was anything else to it, but...there was yellow. For awhile then I was back in Wakanda.”

This prompted Steve to stand up, motioning for Sam to follow.

“Where’s Bucky at?” Steve asked, as they exited the room.

“He might still be here, I saw him earlier.”

The pair searched the tower, eventually finding him sitting out on Tony’s Old landing pad, looking out towards the city.

“Buck.” Steve called out to him. Bucky turned.

“Steve.”

He stood up, reaching eye level. “How’s it going, we needed for anything?”

“Do you remember anything about your time after Thanos snapped his fingers?”

Bucky’s gaze turned confused. “What do you mean?”

“Can you remember any sights or moments between disappearing and coming back?”

“I can’t really recall. I was walking towards you, then I disappeared. Then after a period of what seemed like bright light I was back.”

“Bright light?”

“Yeah.”

Steve looked to Sam then back. “Yellow?”

“....yeah.”

“I’m starting to think Strange could’ve been wrong.” Steve said. “This all could be some massive pipe dream. But regardless we’re going to need to wait for Quill and Thor to return next week.”

* * *

_ “So when can I start moving again?” _

_ “Quiet Nat. Talking is moving.” _

_ “Rude.” She teased. _

_ She resumed her attempt at remaining still while Steve sketched away. _

_ “So am I your muse then?” _

_ Steve scoffed. “I suppose it’s wishful thinking to assume you’d ever sit still for a minute.” _

_ “Hey now, it’s been 20.” _

_ “True.” _

_ “Mr. Perfection.” _

_ Steve smiles at her. _

_ “So you didn’t answer my question. Am I your muse? The Edie Sedgwick to your Andy Warhol? The Holly Woodlawn to your Andy Warhol? The Campbells Soup to your Andy Warhol?” _

_ “If I say yes, promise me you won’t go telling all the other women. They may get jealous.” _

_ This got a laugh out of her. It’s been only a few weeks since they took lead over The Avengers. Living together with Vision, Rhodey, Wanda and Sam. Her laugh has easily grown to be one of his favourite sounds. _

_ “Fancy yourself a ladies man huh?” _

_ Steve shaded more of the drawing. “If I had to try and be one I think I could hack it.” _

_ “Ah don’t be so modest.” _

_ Steve put away his pencil, signalling he was done. _

_ “Duly noted, Romanoff. You think I’m a catch.” _

_ She rolled her eyes. “Am I allowed to see this drawing or not?” _

_ She rose from her seat and sauntered over to where he was sat, to look at what he drew. _

_ It was of her reading a piece of paper, reaching over for a cup of coffee. A sly smile was on her face. _

_ Natasha looked at him. “You really do know how to make me look better in a drawing than I am in person. You’re incredible.” _

_ “Don’t be so critical of yourself. I’d rather you in person than you on a piece of paper.” _

_ This earned a smile from her. _

_ She placed a chaste kiss to his temple. _

_ “I told Wanda I’d show her some defensive strikes. You’re cooking tonight.” _

_ “Wait what? It’s your turn.” _

_ “I know. But I want spaghetti and you make the better sauce. See you at dinner!” _

_ Steve just shook his head as she took off. _

* * *

The Benatar landed on the pad, with Steve, Sam and Bucky standing in wait.

Quill, Thor, Drax, Rocket, Groot, Mantis and Nebula exited the ship, walking towards them.

Quill looked around, taking in the sights. H wasn’t really able to take time to appreciate him being back on Earth during the battle, so he would take in much of the planet as he could whenever he was back.

“Wow. New York. I’ve always wanted to see the city. It’s incredible.”

“How’s it going?” Steve asked.

“All good considering. Abs here nearly got us killed by the Andocregsnians.”

Thor shook his head. “They were not Andocregsnians. I told you that. Groot told you-“

“Anyway, how goes it here?”

“We need your help.”

“Does it pay?” Rocket asked.

“I’m sensing doubt from them.” Mantis answered. Rocket sighed in disappointment.

“We need your help getting to Vormir.” Steve said. Quill looked surprised.

“What? Why there?”

“We’re going to try and get our friend back.”

“It’s impossible.” Nebula said. “No one can undo the consequence of the Soul Stone.”

Steve moved closer. “When you disappeared after the snap, what did you see? Was it yellow?”

Quill, a mixture of confused and taken aback, nodded in confirmation.

“I am Groot.” Groot sounded. 

“What did he say?” Steve asked.

“He was agreeing. It was yellow.” Quill answered.

“What is being suggested?” Drax asked. “Are they saying we can get Gamora back?”

Quill looked Steve squarely in the eye. “Captain, is that what you’re saying?”

“I’m not saying it’s a guarantee. But everyone we have asked has confirmed to us the same thing. I think that people were trapped in the Soul Realm. And I believe the people who sacrificed themselves for the Stone are still there. And if there’s a potential to save them I figured the first place to check is at Vormir.”

“Quill.”

Peter looked to Nebula, who was staring at him.

“Don’t get your hopes up.”

“I won’t. But we should at least try.”

He looked to his fellow Guardians, who remained sceptical.

“Guys it’s Gamora! I can’t be the only one who wants her back!”

“Quill.” Thor said calmly. “I don’t think-“

“Hey no, you didn’t even know her, you can’t possibly understand.”

This angered Thor. “Now you listen, Quill. I may not have known her, but my friend sacrificed herself to get that stone as well so that you could stand here today, so don’t dare presume to think I don’t understand!”

The group of people stood in silence. Peter’s glance softened.

“I’m sorry.”

Thor’s hand clasped onto his shoulder. “It’s forgotten, Quill. Though this may be all for naught, let us try and regain our fallen comrades. It’s worth it for them.”

Steve approached the two. “When would you be ready to depart?”

“Right now.” Quill said.

“Oh hey there you guys are!” a voice called out. It was Scott. “Fury asked me to see if you had ar-“

“Save it tic-tac we’re going to space.” Sam interrupted. Scott stood, now left with nothing to say.

“Ah. Okay. What about Fury and-“

“He can wait. Come on.”

The group made their way to the Benatar. 

“Why are we bringing Scott?” Steve whispered to Sam. A smirk clad Sam looked at him.

“I want to see his face pullback when we shoot off.”

Steve rolled his eyes. Everyone took their seats, as Sam sure to be back and to the right of Scott.

“Maybe we should tell Fury that we’ll be-“ Scott attempted before being pushed back as the ship shot off.

“Look at the ripple!” Sam yelled. 

* * *

“We’ll be at Vormir in the next hour.” Quill announced. He stood at the head of the table with Thor, with Steve, Bucky, Sam, Rhodey and Drax seated around it.

“What should we expect from the planet?” Rhodey asked.

Quill shrugged. “Anything.”

“If this place is a gateway to the Soul Realm, it stands to reason that there’ll be powerful forces wanting to prevent what we aim to do.” Thor said.

“But Thanos destroyed the Soul Stone, doesn’t it stand to reason that the planet could just be abandoned now?” Rocket asked from the pilot seat.

“Steve. What do you think?” Thor asked. Steve up until now had been sat looking outside to the vast darkness. He just nodded.

“We should probably be ready for anything.”

“I’ll get weapons prepared then.” Drax announced, getting up. Sam and Rhodey went to help him while Peter and Thor returned to the helm. Bucky looked at his friend, who’d returned to gazing outside.

“I remembered recently about my encounter with her. In Odessa.”

Steve turned back around, wondering what his friend was getting at.

“I wanted to apologize to her for shooting her. Make amends somehow.”

“You’ll get a chance if this works.”

Bucky shrugged a little, before looking out the window himself. He stood.

“Who would’ve thought that we’d be here. On a spaceship far out past our galaxy. Far past when we’d have likely died.”

Steve huffed a little, standing to join Bucky at the window. “Not bad for two Brooklyn boys, huh?”

A hum of agreement. Bucky watched a comet dart across his view. Mixtures of stars and colours he’d only seen in picture books.

“I always wondered, when you were returning the stones, why didn’t you keep going?”

Steve turned to Bucky. “What do you mean?”

“There was an opportunity for you to keep going. Return to the 40s. Return to Peggy.”

Steve, thinking a moment, looked back out to space. “I always felt awful for leaving her like that. But I remembered that she had a life after me. A family. I saw her again when she was at the end of her life, struggling to remember me. Shortly after, when we were fighting Pierce, me and Nat, we bonded. Not at first but gradually she became one of few I trusted deeply at the time. When she went off after, I missed her, and would hope wherever she was she was safe. She came back, but she at some point fell for Banner. I respected it. But I hated it too. Took me awhile, after Bruce disappeared, even until after the Accords, that it was because I loved her. That time on the run together, it made me realize that I needed her in my life, and now that she’s gone it’s too damn hard to live without her.”

Bucky heard the pain and longing in his friends voice. Steve presses his forehead against the window.

“I accept this is likely a goose chase. But if it is....I honestly don’t know what I’m going to do then.”

Bucky patted Steve’s shoulder. “We’ll do whatever we can.”

“Thanks Buck.”

“Hey Barnes, need your help for a sec.” Sam called. Bucky nodded at Steve before heading over to Sam, leaving Steve to head down towards the beds.

* * *

_Rain pounded down around his car as he steered it upstate to the compound. The state was doing its best to tidy the streets up, as when the snap happened it was during many other people’s regular lives. Cars left in the streets. Homes abandoned because the owners disappeared. A passenger jet crashed just a few miles from the compound, a crash Steve and the others helped to clean up. He could still see the impact it made in the field as he passed by._

_ The lit compound made it seem like it was busy and full but he knew that wasn’t the case. She was there by herself. He hated leaving her there alone. He’s offered to move in but she wouldn’t hear of it.  _

_ Steve parked at the gate, which was closed. Natasha was devastated by their failure to get the gauntlet back, and sent her into a depression. She would have her good days and her bad days. _

_ This was clearly a bad day. _

_ He spent five minutes trying the buzzer, with no acknowledgement made from her. _

_ Getting out, he tried waving at the camera.  _

_ “Nat it’s me.” _

_ No answer. _

_ Steve sighed, electing to scale the gate. He gripped on and started pulling himself over it. _

_ “I’m not in the mood today, Rogers.” a voice suddenly sounded from the box. Steve hopped down. _

_ “I’m just here to do laundry.” _

_ “That’s always your excuse. It’s also 9 at night.” _

_ “I put it off too long. You know me.” Steve said, attempting to soften her up. _

_ “Rogers, seriously. Now isn’t-“ _

_ “You keep saying Rogers. I keep looking for my old CO. Come on Nat, please?” _

_ She didn’t respond, but after a moment the gate opened. Steve got back into his car and drove in. _

_ The compound was deathly quiet, dust collecting on various pieces of furniture. He eventually found her slouched way down in her office chair, swivelling to look at him. _

_ “This isn’t the laundry room.” _

_ “You called my bluff. I just came to see you.” _

_ He sat down across from her. He could see how tired she looked. He swore the clothes she was wearing were the clothes she was wearing three days ago.  _

_ “You’re scanning me.” _

_ “What makes you say that?” _

_ “You’ve been quiet for a minute. Staring at me.” _

_ “Call it friendly concern.” _

_ “Okay, mom.” _

_ Steve rolled his eyes in amusement.  _

_ “When did you last sleep?” _

_ Natasha shrugged. Sighing at her stubbornness, Steve pressed further. _

_ “When did you last eat?” _

_ She shrugged again. “Been a few days I guess.” _

_ Steve turned firm. “Nat. Seriously?” _

_ “Just haven’t gotten round to it.” _

_ Steve rose from his chair. “Kitchen. Let’s go.” _

_ “Steve-“ _

_ “I will carry you there if I need to.” _

_ He held his hand out to her. Letting out a sound of resignation she took it. _

_ He pulled her up and led to to the kitchen, where she took a seat at the kitchen island while he scanned the cupboards. _

_ “Anything you particularly fancy?” He asked, looking to her. She was just looking down at the countertop. Steve continued looking. _

_ “Could- could you make your spaghetti?” She suddenly asked. Looking back to her, he nodded. _

_ “Of course.” _

_ He pulled a box of spaghetti out from the cupboard and put a pot onto the burner. He filled it with water then out the noodles in. Flicking on another burner, he put out a packet of ground beef and began searching for tomato sauce. When he went to search through another cupboard, he saw Natasha standing, opening a can. She handed it to him once it was opened. _

_ “Thanks.” he said, taking it. He put the meat and sauce into a pan, stirring it. He heard Natasha chopping what was probably garlic. Sure enough she appeared next to him and scraped the garlic into the pan.  _

_ “Thanks again.” _

_ It was ready shortly after, and Steve handed her a bowl and put some for himself into another. They sat opposite one another as they ate. _

_ “Thank you, Steve.” _

_ “Don’t mention it.” _

_ It was otherwise silent for a few minutes as they ate. She didn’t maintain much eye contact, focusing mainly on the bowl. Steve wanted to try talking but he kept thinking to himself it would feel forced. _

_ “It’ll be three years tomorrow.” She said suddenly.  _

_ He knew. He doubted it was a day many had forgotten about. He did his best however to help people cope and not fixated on it regularly. Natasha was one he was rather unsuccessful with. _

_ “You can’t torture yourself about this. None of us can.” he simply said. _

_ “That’s easier said than done. I’m just...I can’t move on like you can.” _

_ Steve sat straight, wiping his mouth with his hand. _

_ “You think I moved on?” _

_ This caused her to look at him, tinge of regret for saying that in her eyes. _

_ “Nat, I try my best to help people look ahead but it doesn’t mean I’ve moved on. There’d be nights I lay in bed, thinking about Sam or Bucky. Wanda. We lost so much. And like you I find myself blaming me. But I know they wouldn’t blame me. And they certainly wouldn’t want me to neglect my sleep, or my eating. It bothers me how tired you look. How thin you seem to be. Please Nat, don’t take this out on yourself.” _

_ Her face turned pained and she began to weep. “I just can’t stop thinking about it. It haunts me so bad.” _

_ Steve moves over to her side and took her into his arms.  _

_ “I know you’re right Steve. I’m sorry for making you worry.” _

_ “It’s okay.” he said, rubbing her back. _

_ “I’d do anything I could to fix this. So that they get to live again. So I get to see...to see the rest of my family again.” _

_ Steve sighed as he rest his chin atop her head. He felt Natasha wrap her arms around him. _

_ “If we ever find a way..I’ll do whatever it takes to get them back.” _

_ “We’ll.” She said quietly. _

_ They sat hugging for a few more minutes. She unraveled herself from him and he motioned for her to eat. She complied, even asking for some more after she finished. After, he coaxed her to go take a shower while he cleaned up the kitchen. She returned shortly after, wearing a pretty sizeable robe. _

_ “Big enough for you?” he joked. _

_ “It’s yours. Well, the one Stark left for you. Don’t think you ever used it.” _

_ “They aren’t my thing.” _

_ “Well, May as well make use of it.” _

_ Steve guided her to her room to make sure she would actually go to sleep.  _

_ “Sorry, Steve. For making you worry.” She said as they entered her room. _

_ “It’s okay.”  _

_ She took off the robe and slipped into the sheets. Steve turned to switch the light off. Before he did, he just looked at her for a moment, her eyes had shut. _

_ “You’re allowed to hurt. To be sad. But please remember to take care of yourself. Promise me that.” _

_ The redhead reopened her eyes and looked at him. She gave him a smile. _

_ “I promise Steve.” _

_ “I see you around.” _

_ He flicked off the light and began to leave. _

_ “Steve?” _

_ He looked back to her. She was gazing at him, a look of hopefulness in her eyes. _

_ “Stay tonight?” _

_ Steve nodded as she lifted the sheets for him to join her. Once he laid down she latched onto him. _

_ “I don’t think I would’ve lasted this long if you weren’t still here to pick me up.” _

_ Her words tugged at him. He just held her close to him and kissed her on the temple. _

_ “Goodnight Nat.” _

* * *

This particular memory pained him the most solely because of her last words before going to sleep. Because ultimately he wasn’t there for her when she died. He wondered often if she held that against him in her last moments. Then again, she made the choice to sacrifice herself.

_ “See you in a minute.” _

“Why’d you have to lie, Nat?” he asked out loud.

“What?”

Steve turned around to see Quill behind him.

“Nothing, just talking out loud I guess.”

“Came to say we’re minutes from the planet.”

“Thank you.”

“She’s the one you’re saving, isn’t it.”

Steve nodded. 

“I get it.”

“Gamora. She was Thano’s daughter?”

“Well. It’s complicated on that front. He wiped out her species and took her in as his own. But she broke away from him eventually. She was too good to continue going along with him. She did some bad things. All of us Guardians did bad things. But together we somehow brought the best out of each other. She made me want to be better. Then she gets tossed away by that bastard for some stone.”

Quill slopes down into the edge of the bed. Steve looked at Quill as he talked. The same passion that he had for trying to save Natasha was evident in him. He sat next to him.

“Natasha was similar. Worked for people who didn’t care about her. Made her do terrible things. She was stuck until she was saved. Worked hard to atone for her past. When Thanos snapped away half of the world, it devastated her the most out of those around us. When we figured out we could save everyone she was so...determined. It was just so unfair she didn’t get to be there to see everyone come back. So if I can get her back, I’m going to get her back.”

“Captain, there’s not going to be an if about it. We will get them back.”

He stuck his hand out. Steve took it and they shook.

“ _Quill. We’re here._ ” Rocket announced over the comms.

“It’s time.” Quill said. The men rose and headed up.

* * *

“So hey, what should I do?” Scott asked. “After all I had zero idea I’d be leaving our galaxy today.”

“You stay back with Mantis, Groot and...Rhodes is it?” Quill said.

“It’s Rhodes yeah.”

“Keep an eye on the ship. Let us know if anything happens and we’ll do vice versa.”

“Alright.” Rhodey said.

“Quill.” Nebula said. “Remember, this isn’t guaranteed to work.”

“Nebula, what if there’s a way?”

“What if that way is a greater toll than getting the stone itself? Is that something you’re willing to pay?”

Quill didn’t answer, just quietly holstering his pistol.

“Everyone ready?” Steve asked. He got everyone’s confirmation. Himself, Quill, Bucky, Sam, Nebula, Thor, Drax and Rocket headed off onto the planet.

There was a lot of climbing and walking involved. Getting to the bottom of the mountain alone took nearly an hour. Scaling the side of the mountain took roughly the same time but eventually they reached the top, and sought out the place where the sacrifices were made.

”Captain. I sense we are not alone now.” Thor said suddenly. The group looked around for any signs of what Thor was referring to.

“Those who approach, your journey was for naught.” a voice sounded. Steve stood firm.

“Hello Schmidt.”

“Captain. It’s been...a very long time.”

“For you maybe.”

“I’d figured you would be surprised to see me again.”

“I saw you a few months ago.”

This confused Schmidt but he didn’t press further on this.

“You have come a long way for something no longer here.”

“We aren’t here for the Soul Stone.” Quill said.

“Peter Quill, son of-“

“We also aren’t here for pleasantries.” Steve interrupted. “We’re here for our friends.”

“...your friends.”

“Yes. Natasha Romanoff. And Gamora.”

“I recollect this Gamora, but not this Natasha Romanoff you speak of. Only one sacrifice was made here.”

“She sacrificed herself for another time’s Soul Stone. Regardless of when she still gave herself in exchange for the Stone. She’s in the Soul Realm. And we’re here to take them back.”

“The price for the Stone was one soul for another. This is an exchange that can’t be reversed.”

“It can. It will be.” Quill said firmly. 

“How do you propose that will be done?” Schmidt asked.

Drax approached. “Quill, this is hopeless.”

“Hang on Drax, don’t give in so easily.”

“But Quill what can we offer?” Drax further asked.

“One soul for another.” Steve muttered quietly. “Schmidt. I propose a trade.”

“Captain, your arrogance has survived all these years. You suggest this while assuming I can access the realm.”

“If you can communicate with who or whatever generates the Stone, then you can communicate to them my offer. Otherwise I’m not going to continue being so polite about it.”

The group waited while Schmidt stood silently, shifting his jaw while looking upward. 

“The rules of the Stone apply here as well. One must sacrifice something they love.”

“In exchange for Natasha....I’ll sacrifice myself.”

Sam moves forward and spun him around. “Steve, what? You can’t do that.”

“I can Sam. If it means bringing her back I’ll take her place.”

“But how can you expect her to live with the notion you died for her to live?”

“She’d understand.”

“Steve don’t make me drag your ass away from here.”

“Sam-“

“Steve.”

The two arguing turned to look at Bucky.

“I’m doing it.”

Steve’s eyes widened. “No.”

“You heard what he said, you have to sacrifice something you love. Since you’re the one making the trade it can’t be you. So I’ll do it.”

“I don’t trade lives Buck.”

“But you’d trade your own?”

“I’m making that choice.”

“And what would result is you dying, her living. And I’ve come to know Natasha enough that eventually she’d come right back here and do the same thing you are. But like I said, the person trading can’t be the person who sacrifices themselves.”

Steve gritted his teeth, his eyes stinging a bit. “I spent so long trying to find you again.”

“And you did. Steve you and I are men way past our time. The difference is you have something to live for. Me? I live in pain. Tormented by the things I was programmed to do. The people I’ve killed or hurt. I’m really tired Steve. And if sacrificing myself allows me to rest and reunite you with her, I’ll do it.”

Steve blinked away tears as he hugged his best friend. 

“I’ll miss you.”

The men parted. Sam put his hand on Bucky’s shoulder, nodding at him.

“You’re a good man, Barnes.”

“You as well, Wilson.”

Schmidt observed silently before looking over to Quill. “And what of you? I suspect you’re wishing to save the other.”

“Yes.”

“What is your exchange?”

Quill pondered this. He had no intentions to give up any of his friends.

“I’ll do it.”

Quill looked at Nebula. 

“Gamora and I took too long to become sisters again. She wasn’t given the option to die. I’ll give her the chance to live again. It shouldn’t matter to you anyway. I’m just a collection of upgrades.”

“You’re more than that.” Quill said quietly. “I can’t ask you to do this. I’ll-”

”I choose to do it.”

Quill saw he was not going to win their debate. “We didn’t start off well, but I can safely say you are truly one of the bravest and courageous people I’ve ever met.”

Nebula looked to the other Guardians, who demonstrated their agreement.

“You coulda let us die against Ego. You didn’t. You coulda not helped us undo what Thanos did. You didn’t. If you do this, wherever you end up, I hope you allow yourself to realize this.” Rocket said.

“You have all the admiration I can give.” Drax added, pulling out a necklace from his pocket.

“This belonged to my wife. Her family handed this down for generations. This necklace was worn when one needed comfort. I want you to have it now.”

Nebula took it. “Thank you, Drax.” She looked back to Quill.

“Will you explain to her?”

“I’ll do my best. Thank you, Nebula.”

Nebula left to go and join Bucky. 

“Is this your final offer?” Schmidt asked. 

Steve looked at Bucky and Nebula. Bucky offered a small smile before answering.

“This is.”

“So be it.”

Soon, a bright yellow light shone off the side of the cliff edge, the wind blowing harder. Steve strained to keep his view on Bucky before the light eventually consumed them and everything went dark.

* * *

Steve stirred, finding he was now laying down. His suit now felt damp and he realized he was in some sort of puddle. He sat up and looked around, seeing the others laying on the ground near him. He froze after looking a little to the left of Drax.

There she was, eyes closed as she lay. It was Natasha.

He jolted up, stumbling slightly as he made his way to her. The others beginning to stir as well. Mantis, Rhodey and Scott made their way over from the nearby Benatar. Steve was next to her now, carefully taking her into his arms. Did it work? She didn’t seem to be waking. Delicately, he carried her back to the Benatar.

“Where is Peter?” Mantis asked. Steve looked back, seeing Quill still kneeling on the ground, weeping with Gamora in his arms. Mantis hurried over to join him as Steve moved further into the ship.

“Is she alive?” Scott asked.

“I don’t see her breathing.” Rhodey replied. Steve motioned for them to quiet down.

“Nat? Nat it’s me, wake up.”

After a moment of no movement, they saw her jaw shift slightly. They watched as her eyelids slowly opened. Immediately, her eyes went wide.

“What? What is this?”

“It’s us, Nat.” Steve replied quietly, his eyes stinging again with tears.

“N-no, you can’t be here. Please, please tell me you guys didn’t die. I can’t have failed.”

“You didn’t fail. We won.”

Confusion dawned her face. “How? I had to die for the Stone. How can I be here?”

“We brought you back.” 

Natasha looked around, still confused. The relieved smiles on the men in front of her, soon being joined by Sam, who’d rushed in.

“But how?”

Steve took her hand into his, the smile fading off.

“We found out the Realm you went to could be accessed. So we came here.....and made a trade.”

She pulled her hand away from his. “Trade?”

He nodded. “Soul for a Soul. To get you back...Bucky sacrificed himself.”

“.....no. No you should not have done that. How could you?”

It was now Steve’s turned to feel confused. “What?”

“Steve, why would you trade your best friends life for mine? Why would you think that would be something I could live with?”

“I-I didn’t think-“

“Steve, you said once you don’t trade lives.”

“I know. And when we came here we really didn’t have a plan. It wasn’t going to be Bucky, I was going to do it.”

Her confusion turned now to anger and to the surprise of everyone she smacked Steve across the face. His hand flew to his face, staring at Natasha in bewilderment.

“You shouldn’t have done this, Steve.” She said, before heading to another part of the ship. 

“What just happened?” Scott asked.

“She’s likely just very disoriented and confused. She’s been dead for the past three months.” Sam offered.

Quill and the other Guardians entered, Gamora walking next to Quill.

“Captain, where’s Natasha?”

Steve looked up at him. Quill gave a low whistle.

“That’s quite the mark.”

Standing up, Steve simply looked towards where Natasha had walked off to, a sense of sadness in him.

* * *

They didn’t speak at all the rest of the journey back to Earth. Fury, to their surprise, hugged Natasha for a long time. Clint, who had been on hologram, disappeared for a few moments but returned teary eyed, informing them he’d be on his way to the city. Then after that, he didn’t see her. At least, she clearly indicated she didn’t want to see him. So he gave her some space. 

Soon enough several months had gone by. He didn’t even see her in the halls of the Tower. Despite understanding her feelings, he felt hurt that she didn’t want to talk to him. It felt almost as if she hadn’t been brought back.

He went for a walk one day and wound up at an arboretum he spent time at a lot recently. He liked walking aimlessly through the trees. They also made for some nice sketches.  He took a seat on the grass near a pond and looked out across the water, sketching the sight in the booklet he brought along with him. 

He soon felt a presence near him, and turned to see Natasha sat to his right, looking out towards the pond. She still had her stealth, as she made not one sound. She looked good. Her hair was shorter now and back to full red. It reminded him of the style she wore it when they took down Hydra together. But how her hair looked didn’t matter to him. He was just happy to see her again.

“How did you find me?” he asked. “Actually never mind. I’m asking a spy how she finds people.”

He’d hoped she would’ve laughed at that. He’d been wanting to hear her do that for some time. 

“I’ve...Ive been wanting to talk to you for a few months now.” She finally said.

“I would’ve listened.”

“I know. I just felt ashamed. For how I treated you.”

Steve closed his book and turned his attention fully to her. “I was surprised by that, but I don’t hold it against you.”

“I was certain, for the first week, all of this was just a fantasy, some kind of cruel dream. But I kept waking up after, so I finally understood I was alive again. However I still felt intense guilt. Because Bucky took my place. He died so I could live. That’s not a good feeling to have.”

“I get that. I wish like hell that we could’ve gotten you back without losing someone else. But I got why he made that choice. He held so many burdens on himself. I’ll always miss him, but if this helped him be at peace I hope it helps you to not feel guilty.”

Natasha seemed to believe this, as she took a deep breath out, almost as if a weight was lifted.

“I am sorry, Steve. When you said you wanted to sacrifice yourself...I just felt so angry, because I couldn’t bare it if you died.”

“That’s how I felt in those three months you were gone.”

She looked at him. Her eyes held tears that were waiting to fall.

“Oh god I missed you so much Steve.” She said, reaching forward and wrapping her arms around him. He wrapped his own arms around her, and they just held one another, her face buried in his chest, his chin rested atop her head. They remained like this as the sun gradually set.

* * *

Sam parked his car on the side of the road when he saw them just ahead of him. He hadn’t heard from them for a few days until he received a text from Steve asking him to meet him near the old Avengers compound. Getting out, he walked over to Steve, who was coming to greet him.

“Can’t say I’ve been out this way since the battle. Think they were discussing rebuilding it.” Sam said. 

“I can see why. Being in the city is too constricting for something like the Avengers. Or whatever they’re calling it now.”

“There’s rumblings of SHIELD returning. But just rumblings right now.”

“Minus the HYDRA this time I hope.”

Sam laughed. He looked past Steve to see Natasha approaching.

“I have the route mapped out.” She said to Steve.

“How you doing, Nat?” Sam asked.

“I’m doing well.”

She went to him and pressed a kiss to his cheek. “I’m not sure I thanked you for your part in bringing me back.”

“You have, but I won’t say no to a kiss.”

Steve whispered something to her, which prompted her to nod and return towards their car.

“So, what’s your guys plan?”

“Retirement, if things pan out.”

“Yeah?”

Steve shifted around in his spot. “I think it’s time. I’ve been fighting since World War II. And Nat...she deserves peace.”

“Know where you’re headed?”

Steve shrugged. “We go until we stop I suppose. Somewhere quiet.”

“It’s gonna be strange not having Captain America to lead us anymore.”

“He’ll still be around.”

Sam raised an eyebrow. Natasha returned to them, a bag in her hands which she then handed to Steve. He unzipped it and produced his shield. 

“T’Challa made me a new one, as the other one was destroyed. It’s not the same, but it’ll serve you well I think.”

He held it out to Sam.

“Steve I can’t. I’m not-“

“As long as there’s someone who’ll hold this shield to defend those who can’t defend themselves, I don’t think it’ll matter who holds it. And I know you’ll be a great Captain.”

Sam hesitated again, looking to Steve who’s look simply affirmed his seriousness, before finally sliding the shield onto his arm.

“Looks good on you.” Natasha said.

“I feel like a fraud somehow.”

“Don’t.” Steve said. “You’re one of the bravest men I know. There’s only so many people I can picture holding it and you’re top of that list.”

Sam ran his hand over the top of the shield, examining it further. Finally he accepted what Steve was saying.

“I’ll do my best, Cap.”

“I know you will.”

Steve reaches into his pocket and produced a cellphone.

“However, should there ever be another massive invasion and the world is on the verge of annihilation, give us a call.”

Sam took the phone and nodded. “Emergencies only. Understood.”

With this said, Steve extended his hand. Sam took it and shook.

“Take care of yourselves.”

Natasha smiles wryly before giving Sam a hug. “We will.”

She returned to Steve’s side and the pair walked back to their car. Sam watched as they gave one final wave before getting into it and driving off.

Steve looked at the map Natasha had open. “Montana, huh?”

“Clint always said it’d be somewhere I may like.”

“Then Montana it is.”

Natasha put her hand on Steve’s arm, smiling at him. He smiled back before looking back to the road ahead, guiding them towards their peaceful end.


End file.
